Hating displays of romance
We are such a strange crowd. Why are so many of us such prudes? Amorous hugs, loving kisses, holding hands, in fact any public display of affection are given a sharp shrift as "inappropriate" behaviour at our milongas.
The very same acts which are usually dismissed and totally ignored elsewhere, by almost everyone, are suddenly a problem area to tolerate and cope with by the crowds at our milongas.
Isn't it odd that at any other social fun gatherings such as night clubs, bars, restaurants, or other fun places frequented by adults, no one will batter an eye lid if two people of opposite sex are seen kissing but if it happens at a milonga then some react very shocked as if those two people were seen naked, or that they were seen committing acts of shameful sins!?
No one could tell me that public displays of affection in milongas are referred to by comments such as "cute", "romantic", or "sweet". No! The language used would be more along the lines of "Oh my God!, sleazy or what!?"
In fact what happens are more likely to be that the eyes will roll, the meaningful smiles and gestures are exchanged, the sinful couple are "marked" and talked about and for a long time to come "the sinful couple" are subject of "caught in the act!" conversations.
Why is such a contrast dominating the dance of romance and its real life display at the tango scene?
I am sure many of us have introduced friends and colleagues to dancing tango. Personally I always find it very amusing when I observe my guests' immediate and initial reactions. Their comments at their first encounter with the tango scene are always very alike. The guest visitors often display smiles that try hard to hide their disbelief, bewilderment, joy and fascination and they soon follow by questions "Are they all couples?" They all want to know if these people who are dancing close, and intimate, are actually real life couples or not. The majority finds the intimacy of Argentine tango difficult to comprehend at first simply because it does not fit into the English culture.
What is more amusing to me is that what seems to outsiders as strange, daring or even "shameless" we see as acceptable, normal and very appropriate.
On the other hand many of us feel that a couple kissing is to be frowned upon since it does not fit into the "Milonga Culture"!
An amorous hug, a loving kiss, hands holding, or any other public display of affection are avoided by almost all couples because everyone fears the consequences.
It was just last Friday evening, at the Negracha tango club, that I overheard some very sharp disapproving remarks and comments from some who had witnessed a couple having a few personal moments.
As it happens I had actually seen that couple kissing and cuddling earlier and also later in that evening. They were sitting somewhere out of sight, in a dim lit area in the downstairs room.
This couple may have looked to be excited and engaged in each others' company but they were not doing anything that would have shocked any old ladies at a bus stop.
I am curious to know why there were such sharp remarks being whispered about them by some who had seen them. The couple were not seen compromised in doing anything that was overtly risqué or in anyway indecent. They were just being amorous in a London tango club in the late hours of the night and away from everyone else.
Why do we have such different gages of tolerance for dancing the intimacy of most passionate tangos and the displays of intimate moments of true passion by some young couple in a London milonga?
MilongaCat.
The only cat who loves you back!
